THE READING ROOM - Handy Pandy, Out Went the Rat by Rimy

[jgraeme2007.livejournal.com]

Handy Pandy, Jack-a-dandy,

Loves plum cake and sugar candy.

He bought some at a grocer's shop,

And out he came, hop, hop, hop!

Handy Pandy, Out Went the Rat by Rimy

Just as it took me a while to warm to AU stories, it took me a little time to appreciate third party POV fics. It didn’t help that some of the first I read were het stories from the viewpoint of diabetic-coma-inducing Mary Sues. But at last I stumbled on Rimy’s Handy Pandy, Out Goes the Rat, and I realized just how delectable these morsels could be. 

 

Rimy’s narrator is Hollister, a brash former cop and -- when the story begins -- CI5 trainee. He’s on the target range when he first spots Bodie and Doyle. 

They visited the indoor range one day when I was coming through training, and they more than caught my eye. I knew them for senior agents right off: it wasn't unusual for operational personnel to come by and loose off a few rounds, and for a dead cert these two were neither trainees nor HQ chairwarmers in for their biannual qualification. Fire-eaters, both of them. You can always tell. 

We learn right away that it’s post DiaG and Doyle is attempting to requalify for the A Squad after getting shot in the heart. Through Hollister’s eyes -- and from a distance -- Rimy sketches the lads and their relationship in a few sharp, masterful strokes. 

The first man was competent, no-nonsense, a steady, practiced shooter. He emptied his magazine, put his Walther down, took his target from the return and looked it over, then folded it and tucked it under his weapon on the bench.

The second man took his place. He drew and dry-fired once, twice, three times. His draw was unorthodox, but he was fast. Like a gunfighter in a Wild West film.

He was using one of those new IMI/MRI Desert Eagles, handling it like it was part of his arm. The sleeves of his white shirt were rolled up, and the extended wrist was slender, but the hand was right at home on that big gun, and the hand was in proportion to the rest of the man. More finely built than his partner, he was whippy, all lean, effective muscle and bone with no extra flesh on him. What you might call deceptive.... I knew the type. A man you might take for an easy mark in a fight, say, only to find you'd bitten off a tougher slice than you could chew.

 We don’t need to read about Bodie’s blue eyes or Doyle’s russet curls to know which is which; Rimy captures them in motion. She nails their characters through their action and interaction, and this is (for me) the real charm of a third party POV story: we really do get to observe the lads through fresh eyes. It’s like falling in love all over again. 

The first man reached up and patted the head of the gunfighter, who drove an elbow back into his belly. It was a vicious strike, pulled at the last possible moment. Though the blow didn't connect, the first bloke let out a pained woof, clutched at his ribs, and generally carried on like he was in agony. Ignoring his antics, his partner unclipped his target, reloaded and holstered his pistol, and collected both sets of ear protectors. 

Rimy takes showing-versus-telling to a whole new level. Her work can be oblique, occasionally obscure, but not so in this story. Here, she subtlely shows how nuanced and textured is the relationship between the lads. And, should there be any doubt, we have Hollister -- who falls for Doyle at first sight -- offering his interpretation of what we see. 

Hollister is the perfect unreliable narrator. He’s an accurate observer, but his conclusions are colored by his own assumptions and wishes. He’s vividly depicted but not intrusive. At no point does Rimy make the fatal error of falling in love with own creation or letting him take over the story. She knows that it’s Bodie and Doyle we want to read about.  

So Hollister shows off on the shooting range with his own pistol wizardry, and he meets the legendary pair -- a meeting that ends with him concluding that Bodie is in love with his staunchly and obliviously heterosexual partner. Hollister determines to make a play for Doyle himself. 

Hollister’s enjoyable tactical analysis of Doyle also tells us a lot about Bodie -- and about their relationship.  

He felt things more than he let on, Bodie did. Doyle went in for pyrotechnics. Watching him fizzle, flare, and pop, it was easy to miss the minute flex of the jaw or the faint flinch of the eyes that meant Bodie'd been hit just as hard. It took me months to realise that the less Bodie showed, the more he was feeling.

Working the occasional op with them, I saw Bodie suffer far more for his partner's sake than for his own. Any danger Doyle ran sent him half round the bend--which, in Bodie, meant stoicism and a thousand-yard stare. Undercover operations were the worst. Doyle was a damn chameleon. He wore a legend like it was his own skin, so he drew the lion's share of assignments that required an agent to be someone he wasn't. When he was under alone, Bodie wasn't fit to shoot. It wasn't that he didn't think Doyle could do the job--hell, Bodie put his life in the man's hands on days ending in 'y'--he needed to be there, watching his partner's back.

The story of Doyle getting shot was swapped around frequently at HQ, most often when an agent came down with a mild case of lead poisoning. When I was grazed across the hip in a minor dust-up in Hackney, three different bright lights told me not to expect flowers. Doyle died, they told me, and was back at work: he'd raised the bar for the rest of us.

Bloody Doyle. He would. I wondered how deeply Bodie had been wounded by Doyle's shooting, how he'd survived it, what scars it had left. No one said a word about that, and I hadn't the brass to ask.  

Eventually Hollister goes on an op with Bodie and Doyle. Doyle is shot and subsequently placed -- temporarily -- on the disabled list. Hollister’s own partner is on the sick list. Hollister and Bodie work together and one thing leads to another. They begin sleeping together. Hollister doesn’t kid himself that the relationship is going anywhere; he knows Bodie loves Doyle -- as (he believes) he does. 

What he doesn’t anticipate -- what neither he nor Bodie can anticipate -- are any lasting repercussions. 

They treated each other's flats as jointly owned property, so by tacit agreement Bodie and I got together at my place where there was no danger of Doyle wandering in at an awkward moment. The one time we used Bodie's bed, Doyle was up north on a solo operation. Cowley had said he'd be three weeks gone, and it'd only been ten days.

I'd seen the end approaching. Bodie would call a halt to us, because Doyle was wondering what he'd done wrong, why his partner hadn't as much time for him as he used to do. And Bodie really shot the works that day. I knew his spectacular performance was a sort of finale, a farewell fuck. Wasn't sure how I felt about that, either.... A little sorry. Maybe a little blue.

When the buzzer sounded, Bodie'd just sprawled flat and wasn't about to get up to answer it. As for me, I sincerely doubted my knees would hold me.

"Leave it," I panted.

"Bloody right I will, I'm due a kip." Another buzz. "G'way," Bodie mumbled, draping his arm across his face. "Nobody home."

The next thing we heard was the door opening, and then Doyle's voice: "Bodie? It's me."

 

 

Comments

[tears-of-nienna.livejournal.com]

I think his name is actually Collier? :)

I really enjoyed this fic, too. I love seeing the lads from outside, and the way Rimy describes them--you're right, we don't need a description of hair/eyes to know who's who. We can tell it from their interactions, and from the shape of Doyle's arm. That is pretty cool.

I also love that CI5 is rife with rumors about Bodie and Doyle--are they, aren't they, is it serious, etc. And the way Doyle finds out about Bodie and Collier fooling around...I almost wish we could see inside his head there, but again, I don't think we have to.

I've never seen a man disembowelled alive, but if ever I do, I expect the look on his face will be the one I saw then.

That one line was more painful than the whole shooting scene that had come previously.

[jgraeme2007.livejournal.com]

I think his name is actually Collier? :)

And I was looking right AT the fic as I wrote that!

[jgraeme2007.livejournal.com]

I really enjoyed this fic, too. I love seeing the lads from outside, and the way Rimy describes them--you're right, we don't need a description of hair/eyes to know who's who. We can tell it from their interactions, and from the shape of Doyle's arm. That is pretty cool.

It's a great illustation of how effective the minimalist approach can be.

I also love that CI5 is rife with rumors about Bodie and Doyle--are they, aren't they, is it serious, etc. And the way Doyle finds out about Bodie and Collier fooling around...I almost wish we could see inside his head there, but again, I don't think we have to.

Yes, if there's a weakness here -- and it's not Rimy's, it's the limitations of the third party storytelling -- it's that we aren't privy to the final, climactic scene between Bodie and Doyle. But, realistically, we can't and shouldn't be.

It's just that she does such a great job of drawing us in that I want to keep following that off-stage drama.

I've never seen a man disembowelled alive, but if ever I do, I expect the look on his face will be the one I saw then.

That one line was more painful than the whole shooting scene that had come previously.

Yes, and the restrained description of Doyle -- especially that naked little line:

No, I'm...I've finished. Cowley's ecstatic, he's given me two days...."

No pyrotechnics, so it's all the more powerful.

[firlefanzine.livejournal.com]

In the spirit of International Women’s Day on Monday:
If the 'he' would be a 'she' in this story, everybody would cry 'Mary Sue' and nobody would read it!
- just a thought. ;-)
*sighing*

Collier is nearly 'too perfect', isn’t he? So understanding, knowing when to back off. All he wants is to see Bodie with Doyle happy in the end. :-)
Anyway, the story is interesting and 'different'. And you’re right: "She nails their characters through their action and interaction, and this is (for me) the real charm of a third party POV story: we really do get to observe the lads through fresh eyes. It’s like falling in love all over again."
'Falling in love all over again'... Sigh! That's a perfect description of the affect the story has in some parts. You really should write stories! ;-)
(Oh bugger! I've forgotten to tell you how much I DID enjoy your two "B/D books"! Will do!)

So a 'third party POV story' can be absolutely satisfying. Not always - not often - but this time!

Oh, there was something else that caught my eye.
"I saw the single twitch of a muscle in his cheek, barely lifting the corner of his mouth."

Bodie really has that 'twitch' in some stessy situations - and I love it! But strangely it is not often mentioned in fics.

Thank you for that rec!

Handy Pandy

[heliophile-oxon.livejournal.com]

That's a good point about the Mary-Sue thing - it would be more of an sticking point. Although I think Collier is not too nice-and-perfect; he's flawed and rounded enough a character imo to work as something much more than a "Gary-Stu" or whatever the name is *g*

[jgraeme2007.livejournal.com]

In the spirit of International Women’s Day on Monday:
If the 'he' would be a 'she' in this story, everybody would cry 'Mary Sue' and nobody would read it!
- just a thought. ;-)
*sighing*

Really? Because I think that's the opposite view you should be taking away. *g*

Collier is the rat. He's brash, cocky, he's full of himself, he's a show off, he blows the op where Doyle ends up getting shot, he's trying to seduce a man he believes to be heterosexual -- knowing that the man's partner is in love with him. He's fickle -- in the end he's in love with Bodie, demonstrating that his obsession with Doyle was merely that.

He's well-drawn, he's vivid, but no, there's nothing nice or noble about Collier. Which makes him all the more entertaining a storyteller. At no point do we want Collier to succeed. At no point do we believe Collier would be the right guy for Doyle or Bodie. At no point do I believe Rimy wishes she were Collier. *g*

Collier is nearly 'too perfect', isn’t he? So understanding, knowing when to back off. All he wants is to see Bodie with Doyle happy in the end. :-)

No. Again, no, I think he cares as much for Bodie and Doyle as he's capable of, but he's not understanding so much a realist. There is no room for him in that circle of two. And now he accepts it.

But in Collier's defense, I think we're supposed to excuse some of his bad behavior because he's young and raw and probably a little bit like Doyle and Bodie once were.

Anyway, the story is interesting and 'different'. And you’re right: "She nails their characters through their action and interaction, and this is (for me) the real charm of a third party POV story: we really do get to observe the lads through fresh eyes. It’s like falling in love all over again."

'Falling in love all over again'... Sigh! That's a perfect description of the affect the story has in some parts. You really should write stories! ;-)

(Oh bugger! I've forgotten to tell you how much I DID enjoy your two "B/D books"! Will do!)

Glad you enjoyed my little hybrids. *g*

So a 'third party POV story' can be absolutely satisfying. Not always - not often - but this time!

It is a difficult format because the reader generally wants a minimum of the POV character, and the temptation of any writer is to fall in love with his own creation.

Another good example is JoJo's recent story about Betty. That was also quite well done. Bringing a cipher of a character to vivid life, but not carrying on so long that we became impatient to get back to the characters we love.

Oh, there was something else that caught my eye.
"I saw the single twitch of a muscle in his cheek, barely lifting the corner of his mouth."

Bodie really has that 'twitch' in some stessy situations - and I love it! But strangely it is not often mentioned in fics.

That little muscle clenching in his jaw. Yes. She has a nice eye for detail.

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

I need to re-read this, although I know I like it. A couple of things in your review made me blink though, so that I want to re-read it now to see how it holds up.

The first is where you say:
We don’t need to read about Bodie’s blue eyes or Doyle’s russet curls to know which is which; Rimy captures them in motion.
Actually I have to say that from those first few lines you quoted, I had no idea which lad she was describing until this: The sleeves of his white shirt were rolled up, and the extended wrist was slender - then I knew for sure it was Doyle. So really she did use the "russet eyes" (*g*) thing to differentiate before she got further into the description, just a better version of it... *g*

The other thing was this line:
It wasn't that he didn't think Doyle could do the job--hell, Bodie put his life in the man's hands on days ending in 'y'--he needed to be there, watching his partner's back.
The "hell, Bodie put..." part made Collier sound very American to me, a turn of phrase I can hear almost exclusively from American cop shows etc, so that I started reading him with an American twang... I'm curious now to see whether there's a similar flavour to the rest of it...

There's a similarly themed story by Sebastian too - part of her Siren series, though it's not done from young Tony's perspective... the one always reminds me of the other, though!

[jgraeme2007.livejournal.com]

The first is where you say:
We don’t need to read about Bodie’s blue eyes or Doyle’s russet curls to know which is which; Rimy captures them in motion.
Actually I have to say that from those first few lines you quoted, I had no idea which lad she was describing until this: The sleeves of his white shirt were rolled up, and the extended wrist was slender - then I knew for sure it was Doyle. So really she did use the "russet eyes" (*g*) thing to differentiate before she got further into the description, just a better version of it... *g*

We could say she avoids the obvious cliches, then. But it's more than this because she demonstrates who's who through their actions rather than telling us that one has green eyes and one has dark hair.

Now it could simply be that her characterizations match my ideas of the lads, so when she described Bodie's style of shooting, I knew instantly who she meant.

The other thing was this line:
It wasn't that he didn't think Doyle could do the job--hell, Bodie put his life in the man's hands on days ending in 'y'--he needed to be there, watching his partner's back.
The "hell, Bodie put..." part made Collier sound very American to me, a turn of phrase I can hear almost exclusively from American cop shows etc, so that I started reading him with an American twang... I'm curious now to see whether there's a similar flavour to the rest of it...

Ah. You're highly sensitive to that, so naturally it's going to jar you more than a lot of us. (That's not a criticism, by the way, just observing that I don't think we've ever reviewed a non-British author that you didn't comment on an Americanism or non-Britishism.)*g* I thought she did a very good job overall, but I suppose a certain amount of error is inevitable for non-Brits -- even with Brit checks. She does a good enough job that I just assumed she had a Brit-checker.

There's a similarly themed story by Sebastian too - part of her Siren series, though it's not done from young Tony's perspective... the one always reminds me of the other, though!

I seem to recall we get a few glimpses into Tony's thoughts, yes. I always like Sebastian's use of omniscient POV, but I can't say there's much in that story or Tony's feelings about the lads that reminds me of this -- or that she comes near to doing a third party POV? It's been a while since I read the Siren series, granted.

[callistosh65.livejournal.com]

I think she did a great job with the rhythm of Brit-speak and expressions, managing to sound very naturally British *and* original. A lovely example, if I may: <>iWhen I was grazed across the hip in a minor dust-up in Hackney, three different bright lights told me not to expect flowers. I just love that! 'dust-up' - very common and British, 'three bright lights' - never heard it before, but it totally fits! It is hard to get right sometimes, and it's a tricky line to walk between going all 'gor blimey' and overdoing it and writing faucets and sidewalks all over the place.

And the way she used hell here didn't bounce me out at all. She used it in a train of thought moment where Collier was using it for emphasis, like 'in fact', or 'in truth'. Which was certainly in use in my family back in the 1980s.

[sc-fossil.livejournal.com]

The story was well done for it's genre, which I admit up front isn't a favourite of mine. I didn't have a problem knowing which character was which as well, although I don't see this much "conniving" from a guy, plotting his path to get Doyle, etc. Is that just me? It seems rather feminine... I'm not a guy, so what do I know!

I admit I was very surprised when he and Bodie shagged. All the devotion from Bodie and then he does this bloke, with whom he works. Again, I'm not a guy and I'm guessing they can go at it without any emotional attachment, merely physical release.

Overall an enjoyable read even if he was a bit of a maytyr. *g* In a true sense of the world, it is a "gary-sue" but it was still written nicely. I don't have a problem with that when it's done well enough and not just fangirl squeeing. LOL!

Thank you!

[squeeful.livejournal.com]

No, I've know guys who have pulled similar moves, fucking/dating the best friend of someone they want in order to get close to the actual interest. "See, I'm such a nice guy, I make a good boyfriend, oh too bad that relationship didn't work out, won't you take me?"

Handy Pandy

[heliophile-oxon.livejournal.com]

I suppose strictly speaking he's potentially a Gary-whatever, but I'd never even thought of it until I read firlfanzine's comment above! He is, but I think he's well-written so she carries it off - perhaps because you never get the feeling (well I don't at least) that she's putting herself into Collier in mary-sue style.

I think she makes Bodie and Collier having it off believable, setting it up with both of them knowing Doyle to be definitely and completely unattainable. They've got a lot in common at that point! I like the way she has him mention that it's not "loving" between them - adds to the plausibility.

[shooting2kill.livejournal.com]

I admit I was very surprised when he and Bodie shagged. All the devotion from Bodie and then he does this bloke, with whom he works. Again, I'm not a guy and I'm guessing they can go at it without any emotional attachment, merely physical release.

I'm glad you pointed this out because I wasn't sure if I was misinterpreting things or not but I'm going to try and write a bit more in a jiffy...

[jgraeme2007.livejournal.com]

The story was well done for it's genre, which I admit up front isn't a favourite of mine. I didn't have a problem knowing which character was which as well, although I don't see this much "conniving" from a guy, plotting his path to get Doyle, etc. Is that just me? It seems rather feminine... I'm not a guy, so what do I know!

Well, there's plenty of romantic fiction from "Pamela" onwards where men lay elaborate schemes of seduction, so I think that's pretty much an accepted convention.

I admit I was very surprised when he and Bodie shagged. All the devotion from Bodie and then he does this bloke, with whom he works. Again, I'm not a guy and I'm guessing they can go at it without any emotional attachment, merely physical release.

That doesn't bother me. He thinks he can never have Doyle, he has obvious inclinations that way, and I don't see Bodie celibate. I don't think we'd blink if Collier was a female agent, would we? This Bodie is simply bent,

Overall an enjoyable read even if he was a bit of a maytyr. *g* In a true sense of the world, it is a "gary-sue" but it was still written nicely. I don't have a problem with that when it's done well enough and not just fangirl squeeing. LOL!

Hmm. I think Collier's a pragmatist. Other than acceptance, what other option is left for him at the end?

[squeeful.livejournal.com]

This is an interesting discussion to read because I've never read Collier as a particularly nice person. He's a bit of a dick in my mind.

[jgraeme2007.livejournal.com]

He's a bit of a dick in my mind.

Correct. This is the impression you should be taking away. He's possibly learned something from his association with the lads, and there's a hint that he may eventually have something similiar with his own partner -- too early to say for sure -- but he is both the classic unreliable narrator and a prick.

[shooting2kill.livejournal.com]

I love Rimy’s writing but I didn’t read this for a while because the title put me off. I didn’t like or understand it and I still don’t understand it, but anyway, I finally read it and loved it. I think she writes exceptionally well and has a great way of describing what we’ve read many times before but in a new way so it makes me think I haven’t read it before......things like:

He held the central place in Bodie's scheme of things. He was Bodie's conscience, his comfort, his magnetic North.........
With Bodie, though, as with an iceberg, nine-tenths was below the surface. The water was cold and diving was discouraged.

I love that, 'ice-berg' Bodie and Doyle as his 'magnetic north'.

But because I love Rimy’s writing and I’ve come to expect such a high standard(!) from her I thought I'd allow myself a tiny quibble......OK a couple of tiny quibbles:

As sc fossil has touched on above, I think I was a bit disappointed in the way Bodie ended up sleeping with Collier, not so much because it let down the character of Bodie but because it seemed to let down the writing itself with the writer making what looks like a U turn:

it was plain enough that Bodie loved him, but not so evident at first how exhaustive and unswerving that love was was. Bodie had many of Doyle's virtues and few of his faults, but what he did, he did for Doyle; to a lesser extent, for Cowley.

But then in the next minute (almost) Doyle’s wounded so Bodie jumps into bed with someone he doesn’t even like much? Nothing much has prepared the reader for this change in direction so it left me feeling......unprepared, I suppose and disappointed.

And another thing....by the end I was a little confused with who the narrator was supposed to be in love with (maybe both?). At one point he says this:

What worries me is, sometimes I wonder if I'm not still a little bit in love with Doyle as well. As well as Bodie? Maybe I missed something because earlier he says this:

It was good with us. Really--good. Never the grand passion, but it was matey and, truth be known, it was mutually convenient

And then this:

We never forgot who we were screwing, though. I never closed my eyes and pretended it was Ray I was with, and I know Bodie didn't. We weren't loving.

So....he confuses me.

But anyway, having said all that, I like this story very much and you're right, writing from this point of view really is like falling in love again. I feel that an outsider's pov lends the story that bit more than the normal pov. i.e. the effect is even more erotic and voyeuristic than just looking at them through our own eyes - we learn more about them and their relatioship and so that's a bonus.

Thanks for this rec!

.

[jgraeme2007.livejournal.com]

I love Rimy’s writing but I didn’t read this for a while because the title put me off. I didn’t like or understand it and I still don’t understand it, but anyway, I finally read it and loved it. I think she writes exceptionally well and has a great way of describing what we’ve read many times before but in a new way so it makes me think I haven’t read it before......things like:

He held the central place in Bodie's scheme of things. He was Bodie's conscience, his comfort, his magnetic North.........
With Bodie, though, as with an iceberg, nine-tenths was below the surface. The water was cold and diving was discouraged.

She has a clever way with words, and the occasional beautiful turn of phrase.

I love that, 'ice-berg' Bodie and Doyle as his 'magnetic north'.

I love these lines. Not because she's observing anything a hundred writers haven't observed, but because of the fresh way she states it.

While he studied my target, I studied him: a froth of brown hair, lived-in face, hard green eyes, and a sexy, sexy mouth, the sort you couldn't look at without having to rein in your imagination. Greyhound body, sallow-toned skin with a light overlay of tan.

I love the "lived-in face" and we know from the sallow-tone and light overlay of tan, that Doyle is still recovering. She packs a lot into such a few lines.


But because I love Rimy’s writing and I’ve come to expect such a high standard(!) from her I thought I'd allow myself a tiny quibble......OK a couple of tiny quibbles:

As sc fossil has touched on above, I think I was a bit disappointed in the way Bodie ended up sleeping with Collier, not so much because it let down the character of Bodie but because it seemed to let down the writing itself with the writer making what looks like a U turn:

it was plain enough that Bodie loved him, but not so evident at first how exhaustive and unswerving that love was was. Bodie had many of Doyle's virtues and few of his faults, but what he did, he did for Doyle; to a lesser extent, for Cowley.

But then in the next minute (almost) Doyle’s wounded so Bodie jumps into bed with someone he doesn’t even like much? Nothing much has prepared the reader for this change in direction so it left me feeling......unprepared, I suppose and disappointed.

Well...I guess it doesn't bother me because I see Bodie as such a pragmatist -- and a sexual opportunist. He pretty much sleeps with everything that moves, and if we establish that he's inclined to like men, then why wouldn't he sleep with a willing male partner?

But since it has been mentioned so frequently, could it subconsciously tie in with the popular notion that Bodie and Doyle are each other's only exception to their heterosexuality? Because all kinds of stories have them trying it on with female agents -- or occasionally Murphy -- so why not Collier, really?

[squeeful.livejournal.com]

Aww, I love the title. It intrigued me rather than putting me off. I like titles that a bit more than "one word here" or "basically a summary in five words or so".

[jgraeme2007.livejournal.com]

Aww, I love the title. It intrigued me rather than putting me off. I like titles that a bit more than "one word here" or "basically a summary in five words or so".


It is different! Titles are important, that's for sure. That's why publishing houses generally keep final say on the choice of a title.

[constant-muse.livejournal.com]

Even after you've quoted some of the rhyme, I still don't get the title. Where does the rat come in (or go out)? You said before the Collier is the rat, so maybe it is important to know the verse.

I think this fic must be the one I've seen recced almost more than any other. Maybe it's the classic example of the third party pov. So of course I read it a while ago, and didn't like it much, mostly because of the toe-curling embarrassment of Doyle walking in on Bodie and Collier, and Bodie futilely struggling to get his pants on. ugh, it's so sordid (well written, though!). It's such a ghastly scene, that was what stayed with me, the discomfort of it.

But re-reading it just now, I was pleasantly impressed. Mainly, the first couple of pages are like a manifesto of Bodie and Doyle's characters and relationship, what we (slash fanfic readers) see in them, what we love and admire about them.

Third party pov is great, love it, and especially here where the narrator is a real insider, training and working with the lads. I like about Collier that he is competent and enjoys CI5. It would be easy to write an OC like this who was weak and struggling, especially if he is fairly unsympathetic (I think you're right, btw, that he is brash, cocky, he's full of himself, he's a show off..., but it took you to point that out to me).

The good thing about Collier getting on well in CI5 is that his work performance becomes irrelevant, he has no problems with being there, so we don't have to think about that, just focus entirely on the interaction between Collier and the lads, knowing he is their equal apart from experience.

And finally, one of my squicks is first-time fic set well after Doyle's shooting. He didn't even have fluffy hair by then... Seriously, I find it difficult to accept that such an intense relationship would take so many years to trip over into the sexual relationship (and if Bodie nursing him after the shooting didn't do it...). The trigger here seems to be Doyle finding Bodie with another man - but if he just needed to know that Bodie might fancy other men, I can't believe he hadn't found that out before.

Thanks for making me re-read this fic, and see so much more in it.

[jgraeme2007.livejournal.com]

I think this fic must be the one I've seen recced almost more than any other. Maybe it's the classic example of the third party pov. So of course I read it a while ago, and didn't like it much, mostly because of the toe-curling embarrassment of Doyle walking in on Bodie and Collier, and Bodie futilely struggling to get his pants on. ugh, it's so sordid (well written, though!). It's such a ghastly scene, that was what stayed with me, the discomfort of it.

It's horrifying, isn't it? Painfully real.

And I can't think why Bodie doesn't yell, "Yes!" when Doyle asks if he has someone with him. *g* But maybe it's the instinctive guilt of who he has in there. That Doyle would understand a woman, but not another man.

But wondering about that is one of the things I like -- I like writers who make me think and wonder after the story ends.

But re-reading it just now, I was pleasantly impressed. Mainly, the first couple of pages are like a manifesto of Bodie and Doyle's characters and relationship, what we (slash fanfic readers) see in them, what we love and admire about them.

Yes!

Third party pov is great, love it, and especially here where the narrator is a real insider, training and working with the lads. I like about Collier that he is competent and enjoys CI5. It would be easy to write an OC like this who was weak and struggling, especially if he is fairly unsympathetic (I think you're right, btw, that he is brash, cocky, he's full of himself, he's a show off..., but it took you to point that out to me).

That's what I like, though. It's subtle enough that it doesn't hit you the first time through. It's as you re-read and consider that you see what she's done.

The good thing about Collier getting on well in CI5 is that his work performance becomes irrelevant, he has no problems with being there, so we don't have to think about that, just focus entirely on the interaction between Collier and the lads, knowing he is their equal apart from experience.

Right. There's another story like this...I can't remember who by. Meg Lewtan maybe? Where we see the lads on the job from the perspective of another agent. I really enjoy those.

And finally, one of my squicks is first-time fic set well after Doyle's shooting. He didn't even have fluffy hair by then...

I know. I preferred his hair in the earlier eps, so I close my mind to that. *g*

Seriously, I find it difficult to accept that such an intense relationship would take so many years to trip over into the sexual relationship (and if Bodie nursing him after the shooting didn't do it...).

Yes, I agree. I see DiaG as the turning point -- assuming it didn't happen sooner.

The trigger here seems to be Doyle finding Bodie with another man - but if he just needed to know that Bodie might fancy other men, I can't believe he hadn't found that out before.

And because it's third person POV, we don't get to know whether Doyle always fancied Bodie but didn't think it was a good idea or didn't think he had a chance or what the explanation is. I would have loved to have seen that confrontation between them!

Thanks for making me re-read this fic, and see so much more in it.

I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

Handy Pandy Title

[(Anonymous)]

"Handy Pandy, Out Goes the Rat" is similar to "Eenie Meenie Mynie Moe...etc." Children sit in a circle and the leader says "handy pandy out goes the rat" while pointing to each person, one body per syllable. The person being pointed to when the leader says "rat" is out. The phrase is repeated until only one kid remains, and that person is "It" for whatever game is being played.

Perhaps this explanation helps understanding the title, though I may be wrong. The narrator is the rat, and is out by the end of the story.

[callistosh65.livejournal.com]

a froth of brown hair, lived-in face, hard green eyes, and a sexy, sexy mouth, the sort you couldn't look at without having to rein in your imagination. Greyhound body, sallow-toned skin with a light overlay of tan. Just a great, great description of Doyle. I just went to reread this and enjoyed it thoroughly. You're right, it is like falling in love with fresh eyes when the pair of them and their dynamic are observed through a third party. And yes, she never forgets that it's Bodie and Doyle we're here to read about.

Also dialogue gal that I am? Hers is to *die* for.

Thank you for reccing this, I'd forgotten what a terrific story it is.

[jgraeme2007.livejournal.com]

Also dialogue gal that I am? Hers is to *die* for.

Dialog being one of the hardest things to get right. Yes, I agree! Hers really crackles.


Thank you for reccing this, I'd forgotten what a terrific story it is.

Thanks for reading. So glad you enjoyed it.