The Reading Room - late but here now

[constant-muse.livejournal.com]

As promised, now I'm back home with reliable internet, my recc for:

"Emmanuel" by foxcat74

http://community.livejournal.com/discoveredinalj/138870.html#cutid1.

This is a short but very eloquent study on the fate of the war veteran back in civilian life, and what might have been for Bodie. It is a reminder of how society often neglects these men, and gives Doyle an opportunity to be thoroughly decent and principled. I ought toapologise to foxcat74 for reading her 6th January fic, which she posted in a Christmas fic challenge, as relating to Remembrance day. Can I say it works for both?

Comments

[firlefanzine.livejournal.com]

Doyle alone. A crime scene. A dead man. And it’s ice cold. Where is Bodie?
"No, he’s not around"
"Bloody, fucking Bodie", "...stayed with Bodie until it arrived, helped stop all that blood."
Or later: "He was wearing your coat.” – “I know"
There are no long explanations in this story. There is a lot left to the imagination. I like that very much! Those few words are enough to create an atmosphere of desperation, fear and danger.
This sentence: "Still thinner than he should be and far too pale.", contains the whole universe of h/c. And it’s enough to feel very deeply for Bodie, and for Doyle too.

So I read it twice so that I won’t miss a thing! That’s probably because I stumbled over the word 'chuckle': "A low chuckle drifted from behind him and he closed his eyes...".
I’m no native speaker, but doesn’t come ‘chuckle’ together with some kind of humour? I feel that it’s a bit strange for the situation at the cemetery.
And then: "I’m sorry I missed the funeral, Ray. I would have been here if I could, you know."
Doyle nodded and let out a low breath. "You were in hospital."
That’s something else that confuses me. Isn't it like stating the obvious fact?
Or does that fit to the icy atmosphere in the fic, that shows not only in the cold weather but also for example in the behaviour of the neighbours? Is it a sign that there is not much conversation between Bodie and Doyle? That Doyle hasn’t visited Bodie in hospital, that they hadn’t talked?
– I can’t believe that!

So I’m a bit confused. – but nonetheless I like the mood in the fic very much!
Desperate and hopeful - it’s bittersweet!

Thanks for the rec!

[constant-muse.livejournal.com]

Re 'chuckle', I think Bodie is amused by overhearing Doyle's remark about 'paperwork'. It just occurred to me, reading that again, that Doyle is talking to the dead man, and Bodie is the one who responds - further identification of Wilf and Bodie, maybe.

Also Bodie seems to be humouring Doyle, trying to make him feel better (h/c again, but Doyle is hurting). Bodie isn't too depressed about Wilf, he's probably more worried about his own survival and recovery after being shot, and he just seems more pragmatic in his attitude to Wilf's death. His concern is to comfort the living - Doyle.

I think it's nicely understated, and that includes the lack of conversation. But foxcat very deftly describes many gestures that say a lot too.

I'm glad this appealed and the mood got to you too.

After I recced this, it occurred to me that lots of people commented on it last January, not so long ago - oops.

[firlefanzine.livejournal.com]

Convinced!
In all points!

I just can explain my misunderstanding that Foxcat was able to create that desperate mood too good - that I've totally forgotten, that it's not inevitably also Bodie's state of mind...
*shakes head*
It's very likely that he tries to brighten up Ray!

The fic is getting better and better!

Yes! Quite quiet here... :-(

[smirra.livejournal.com]

I have read it the moment that way too.
Bodie won't hav Doyle in a dark mood too long. And finding him that way he might have thought: 'Typical Doyle...'

Interesting approach to the lads with this back story. As said before it has atmosphere and detail. A good winter read!

[shooting2kill.livejournal.com]

I really liked this when I first read it and I still do. I'm always harping on about 'atmosphere' in stories and the absence or presence of it usually makes or breaks a story for me, so I'm really interested in how this writer - or any writer - manages to create such a powerful 'mood' in such a short space. She managed to do it really well in her seaside story (can't remember the title, sorry) which was also quite short but very memorable. Maybe it's as you both mention above, things like less conversation and more gestures, description of place etc? Paying special heed to the setting/place? Whatever the ingredients it certainly works for me. And a good choice for today, I'd say.

[constant-muse.livejournal.com]

If only one could bottle and sell that ability to create atmosphere in written words.

Too much description would risk killing it by bashing the reader over the head with too much information.

I could say foxcat does it with a few key images - cold metal, Doyle's scarf, a crate, snowdrops - as well as the gestures. Before I re-read this, I actually thought she wrote the scene where Doyle was at the bleak funeral, but in fact he just tells Bodie something about it. Again a few images, like the council mourner and the hymns, evoked the image so well (a bit improbable perhaps, having the funeral on Christmas day, but that's artistic licence for you).

[shooting2kill.livejournal.com]

I think I'd agree with the examples you give for how a writer creates atmosphere, a sense of place etc.

And yes, this is so easy to do:

Too much description would risk killing it by bashing the reader over the head with too much information.

and can result in a big yawn from me. And yet it might not mean the writing's actually bad writing, more that I'm just not interested in what the writer is being so detailed about, or not interested in the amount of detail provided. I think I found this with Thomas Hardy once - too much description of all-things natural, like nature, seasons, wild animals, countryside and stuff. Even with Martin Shaw reading it I didn't like it at all..... just too much information. But I'm sure the problem is mine and not his (Hardy, not Shaw).

[moth2fic.livejournal.com]

This is lovely - an absolute jewel of a fic. It's so short yet there's all the danger of their work, all the fear for each other, all the need to support each other and all the innate respect for others. I love the ending and the New Year resolution.

The 'chuckle' is, I think, just a warm laugh, not necessarily denoting any specific humour. Bodie sees that Doyle is in a 'cold' frame of mind and is missing him, Bodie. as support, so he wants to let him know he is there for him. I love the way that right up to and including the chuckle we aren't sure Bodie is alive. This reads so like a death fic that Bodie's appearance is like the sun coming out.

The ways in which Wilf is like Bodie, or, in fact, like both of them, make it all the sweeter that ultimately they are different; they have each other.

I read this when it first came out but have just realised I never left feedback so I must go and remedy that - thanks for the rec, which led me to re-read it and enjoy it all over again!!

[sc-fossil.livejournal.com]

Finally had a chance to reread this very nice fic. Thanks for pointing it out. It's definitely worth a reread.

Emmanuel

[heliophile-oxon.livejournal.com]

Wish I'd had time to comment properly now, as well as leaving a woefully brief comment back then; I love this fic and I think it's a real gem - brilliantly evokes so much in so few words, and so moving it always does something funny to my eyes ....

Very much a keeper.