How do you define Het?

[myrebelcat.livejournal.com]

I popped in late and was reading the discussion below, including the one on the Circuit Archive, where I found this question:

"If B or D is with a woman in a story, and they aren't with each other in the story, but they don't end up with the woman, is that a het story? If it's basically a case story, like an episode, and there's incidental shagging with a woman, but no serious relationship - the relationship isn't the focus of the story - does that get a het label?"

Considering that I just wrote a story that meets this criteria, I'm definitely wondering. I didn't give it a het label, because I assumed that folks who read het would be disappointed by the lack of anything resembling an actual relationship between Bodie, Doyle and the women they boff over the course of the case.

OTOH, the sex is pretty graphic. And kinda gross (since I wasn't going for titillating, lol!). Does that factor into whether something is het or not?

Oh, and a bonus question! If Bodie and Doyle spent a whole story boffing *men*, but never ended up in a relationship with either the men in question or each other - how would you label the story then?