ci5hq | Reading Room - Fic: Gavity's Angel by Anonymous (Reply)

This story if from the Proslib CD. I apologize for any trouble to get hold of the story. But I hope that everybody was able to read it! And there is still time – I can send it in a minute...

There are some treasures on the CD – and I think that this story is one of them.
(So go and join the Yahoo group and get the CD!)

**

A few days ago, when I reread the story and started with that rec – I had first no idea what to write. Because actually there is a lot I normally dislike in a story. First of all it’s Doyle/OMC at the beginning. That’s a real challenge for me OTP girl.
Then it’s AU, well not an entirely other world – Bodie is in CI5 – but Doyle is a photographer.
Then the whole art-scene, with parties and drugs. And most of all there is a lot of insecurity and even pretending between Bodie and Doyle.

Despite all that, despite all the angst in the story, despite that OMC – the story caught me from the beginning, probably because the author was able to build up a good and convincing scenario.

Yes, I think there is so much ‘in’ this story. Here are just a few notes.

A different scenario
Both in CI5 – that’s easy for them. I mean to be friends, or to love each other. It’s that ‘us against the world’ feeling. It’s easy to belong together, when you have the impression that nobody else understands you, that everybody else would disapprove the job – the killing. That you can’t talk to anybody about your feelings and fears. Especially not if you pick up your girls on occasion and just because of the good look... How can such girls understand them?
Here both live in different worlds. And obviously Bodie can’t imagine that Doyle would ever fit to his.
And they have big problems in their partnership!

AIDS
Not often even mentioned in Pros. Although the time was right. I know just one other story where it occurs (Doyle is an activist of a gay group), and only Minerva’s story deals with one of them being infected.
Here it’s no main subject – and I’m glad about it! – but it appears as something two gay men would naturally(?) talk about at that time.

Doyle losing his innocence and happiness being together again with Bodie and leaving Steve.
That is something very unusual for me! That both are obviously not good for each other – because they are not able to break down the walls. Doyle is hurt and Bodie can’t do anything against Doyle just wanting cold-blooded sex.

Doyle is not a nice guy
He is sometimes a quite selfish bastard. He isn’t really interested in Bodie’s work, otherwise he would have asked more. He is happy that he can talk about HIS daily life that is obviously so much more interesting than Bodie’s…
Then there is the way he thinks about CI5, after he finds out. Typical for the scene he lives in.
He takes drugs(occasionally) and he even was a drug dealer as a kid.

War and Sex
That’s a very intense scene after the events in the Chilean Embassy. Doyle isn’t the selfish bastard! He really cares.
And Bodie is exhausted but anyway he first doesn’t dare to break his walls – but when he does he is very violent.
Doyle is his valve.
Coming back to senses he realises that he endangers Doyle - and leaves him again.
Huh! That whole scene is great!

How about Murphy ?
I’m not sure.
Without Doyle as partner, Bodie would have been probably very close to Murphy.
OR - without Doyle as a partner, Bodie hasn’t open so much to anybody. And it really seems so: “Bodie was not particularly accustomed to warm social contact…” Maybe he is a loner.
But anyway – he must be very upset about the death of Murphy! But again Doyle doesn’t notice that.
Bodie doesn’t dare to speak about his feelings – and Doyle doesn’t care enough... Great!
(I dunno if that makes a relationship between men easier!?)

The end and rape
It’s a good end. I mean well done, not that I think that the rape was ‘necessary’ – but maybe it’s there to show how they treat Doyle afterwards – just a pansy being raped...

The very end
” I want to remember forever this moment in my lifetime when we shared love. I'll always have the memory for the empty years ahead, with hollow laughter and creeping numbness. Whatever happens from here, I want to cling to this feeling, overflowing with loveliness and undeniably real, to store it away inside with a warm glow and no bitterness.”
To be true – I don’t understand it...
Why “empty years ahead” ?

Who was it?
Would be nice if the author would be still around... How about an outing? ;-)