ext_19925 ([identity profile] byslantedlight.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] ci5hq2019-04-27 12:06 pm

Pros Novel Read-Along - Painted Angels by Angelfish - Chapter Five

01 Cover paintedangels-small At last!

Painted Angels by Angelfish.
Cover art by [livejournal.com profile] firlefanzine

Chapter Five


Chapter Five

There has been a bomb explosion, and like the other emergency services, Bodie and Doyle, now working together as a team, responded. On arrival, however, Doyle remained by the car, too scared to go any further, while Bodie ran straight into the cloud of smoke to help.

Eventually Doyle screws up his courage and joins Bodie, who is assessing what seems to be a detonator. Doyle recognises it as a specific Irish terrorist group, and Bodie immediately knows who he's talking about. They realise that there's a second device nearby, ready to go off when the emergency services have arrived. They find it, and Doyle uses his penknife to cut the wires - a mad guess between red or blue, because it could be either - and saves the situation.

Even as they're laughing in relief, however, one of the first bomb's victims staggers into them and collapses. They're badly burned and blinded, and asking for Richard. Bodie recoils but Doyle pretends to be Richard as comfort as the man dies in his arms.

The next thing Doyle knows is that he's sitting on a wall outside a church with Bodie, though he can't remember getting there. Bodie is rubbing his back, then "tangles... fingers into his hair, carressing" and explains that the first time in such a situation is the worst, and he'll be okay. Doyle points out that he doesn't ever want to be "okay" with this situation, and begins to feel guilty about not having been able to stop it. He knows London so well, he should have seen some sign. Bodie rejects this - "Jesus Christ, Doyle. You'll sink both of us."

Doyle realises he's been in shock, recovers, and just as he's getting up spots a priest helping the victims. He's not impressed - "Oh great... God's here." Bodie's puzzled by this, and Doyle realises that the priest is giving first aid, not the last rites. As he watches the priest, however, and then hears his voice, Doyle realises that he's familiar. ""Gabriel. Gabe!" and begins to walk into the crowd."

So - what did you think?
ext_1241: (bob's bath)

[identity profile] jat-sapphire.livejournal.com 2019-04-27 12:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Jeez, all that. But I loved the bomb-defusing scene. I could really see it in my mind, and the banter and trust there was so recognizable. I love that Doyle cut the other line and that it turned out to be right without some sort of defensive display from Bodie. (Still wondering where all that damage went, though.) I like the structure of the chapter, and the descriptions are great. And there's Gabe again, and a chapter break that really makes me want to read on.

I just ... I feel as though a storyline that means "life has nearly broken both of them but they save each other" and one that means "they're already survivors, each in his own way, and all they need is to respect and trust each other" are both perfectly plausible, but they do not mesh. Then the writer ends up slicing and mixing them up, and I'm getting whiplash here. Plus the "Bodie actually IS perfect" subplot doesn't help either storyline.
ext_1241: (bob's bath)

[identity profile] jat-sapphire.livejournal.com 2019-04-27 09:40 pm (UTC)(link)
I think those two versions of Bodie and Doyle COULD mesh, but they don't. Maybe because Bodie, for instance, has coping strategies that are all over the map. Needing to control, being a perfectionist, knowing everything he can and then figuring no other knowledge is worthwhile, okay, but killing prisoners while interrogating them, dumping fellow agents in it to preserve his own advantage, toying with the consent of his friend with benefits--nope, I don't see how Doyle can help save or be saved by them. Another bit that feels like a revision fix is that when Doyle just rides Bodie's moods, then he's okay, which also seems to work for about a day and then not.

I want Bodie to get better, but I want to understand better how that is happening. There are parts of this story when I feel like he packs up his baggage and ignores it for a while, and that doesn't feel true to me.

I'm anxious to get the Gabe plot resolved at least somewhat, but I can't see how that really furthers the B/D part either. I know we're still in the middle, but I guess I don't want to think the problems in forming a real partnership are unsurmountable.
ext_1241: (bob's bath)

[identity profile] jat-sapphire.livejournal.com 2019-04-28 12:53 am (UTC)(link)
Well, we'll see as the novel goes on. I hope it does all tie up well.